Duncan would have wanted to chat to it all night. "If toilets could talk, eh?"Īnnie was glad this one couldn't. Eventually, and hurtfully, the barman had clearly decided that they were capable of doing neither thing.ĭuncan took one last look and shook his head. The guy behind the bar had initially suspected that they were looking for a place where they could shoot up, or perhaps have sex.
When Duncan moved, she could see that this toilet, like just about every other one she'd ever seen in a rock club, was blocked. Annie took as good a picture of a man in a toilet as one could reasonably expect. The light was better there, for some reason. This time Duncan stood just inside one of the stalls, with the door open. Be silly to come all the way here and not get a good one." So Duncan stood in front of the middle of the three urinals, his hands placed convincingly in front of him, and smiled back over his shoulder at Annie. "Have you got the camera, Annie?" said Duncan. Americans were very good at making the most of their heritage, but there wasn't much even they could do here. The simple truth of this only struck Annie when they were actually inside it: apart from the graffiti on the walls, some of which made some kind of reference to the toilet's importance in musical history, it was dank, dark, smelly and entirely unremarkable. They had flown from England to Minneapolis to look at a toilet. Note: There is language in this excerpt that some readers may find offensive. For another, she's wearying of his condescension: "Listening to music was something that she did, too, frequently and with great enjoyment, and Duncan somehow managed to spoil it, partly by making her feel that she was no good at it." Then he has an affair. For one, she wants a baby, and Duncan is just not a family man. Duncan devotes himself to parsing Crowe trivia and posting scholarly disquisitions on a fan site.Īnnie - intelligent and more attractive than she knows (another Hornby type) - has recently begun to find Duncan maddening. Duncan, a classic Hornby type, is an obsessive fan of Tucker Crowe, a singer-songwriter who, after producing a brilliant breakup album called Juliet, mysteriously dropped out of sight in 1986. This is what Hornby does, he does it well, and he's done it again.įor the past 15 years, Duncan and Annie, an unmarried couple on the verge of middle age, have stagnated together in a dumpy British seaside town.
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You don't buy a Van Morrison CD hoping to hear him do something radically new and different, and you shouldn't crack the latest Nick Hornby novel, Juliet, Naked, expecting anything more, or less, than another smart, soft-centered tale of hapless manchildren, precocious actual children and sensible women.
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Nick Hornby's previous books include About a Boy, High Fidelity and How to be Good.